If you have been through a break up and desperately want to get your ex girlfriend back take a step back for a minute and ask yourself why you feel so lost without your ex. Have you been thinking thoughts like:

She was the best thing that ever happened to me. I’m completely useless without her. She is everything to me. No one else even compares to her. I’ll never be happy again without her.

These thoughts aren’t helping you in the least right now and they really aren’t true either. You can absolutely be a happy guy again without her, and if you don’t understand this you’re going to have a harder time whether or not you do succeed in getting your ex girlfriend back.

If you go on thinking that you can’t make it without this person or that you are afraid to be alone then you will have problems in this relationship and in any relationship in the future. The truth is you have to be OK with yourself first. Not only will you be happier but you will be more attractive to your ex girlfriend and to all women in general.

So if the reasons above are the only ones you have for wanting to get your ex girlfriend back you need to ask yourself whether you really do need her or you need to find yourself instead.

You deserve to have a relationship based on love, not on need. Although many romantic movie cliches portray romantic love as two people who profess how much they need each other, this is a co-dependent type of relationship instead of the healthy relationship two complete people who choose to share a life together can have.

So if you are feeling more needy than loving right now, that’s OK. Take some time and work on yourself and allow real love for your ex girlfriend to unfold. You can choose to love instead of cling and this will boost your confidence enough to give your ex girlfriend the space she may need right now. And it will give you time to reflect and plan before you make your next move to get your ex girlfriend back.

When you choose to let go of the needy thoughts and feelings and focus instead on the things you love about your ex girlfriend and some of the positive reasons why you want to get back together you will be amazed at how much better you feel about yourself. And this is a much SMARTER way to go about getting your ex girlfriend back!

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